Another Miracle!!

Back in October Elijah's Developmental Specialist said that Elijah would require braces to stand, and would probably require them to walk and would need a wheelchair....

I guess....

God has other plans!

Because not quite a month after that diagnosis Elijah pulled to stand on his own, now he is working on cruising! Without braces!!

I give all the glory to God!

After Elijah's diagnosis my mother felt led to be anointed and prayed for, to stand in for Elijah. God is still working in Elijah's life. I honestly believe that Elijah will walk without assistance, if God wills it!

Elijah's diagnosis...

Wow, it has been a long time. So much has happened. My boy's and I have moved in to a new place. Nursing school is going great. I am so busy. Elijah was diagnosed with Cerebral Palsy a few weeks ago. Though it is a expected diagnosis, it is still hard to come to terms with. My 3 year old is also seeing a developmental specialist for possible Aspergers. Through all the testing I have found out one thing that I was all ready pretty sure about anyway. My 3 year old is brilliant! He scored through the roof on his IQ test and is academically ready for Kindergarten, but wont be going of course due to maturity. Most of his problems are with fine motor skills and sensory issues. I have a feeling we are in for a wild ride, and doing it by myself is going to be hard, I won't lie, money is a big issue. I am hoping to be able to afford Christmas for my kids this year.

Please keep me and my boy's in your prayers, and I will try to keep you updated. I don't have Internet at my home, so I have to go to the library or my parents house!

I don't have any pics to post right now but will do so soon. Elijah is crawling, though his left side is weak and causes some problems, and he is finally sitting up, at 18 months.

I know God has brought him this far and I know he has BIG plans for Elijah! :)

School Days

Today my sweet little boy

Had his first day of school, Headstart that is!




My Big Boy finished up his first week of HIGH SCHOOL!

And I finished up my first week of Nursing School, lol!

Surgery Update

Just a quick update, Elijah's surgery went well. I was able to go in with him and hold him until they put him to sleep. That was sort of scary for me but I thought it might make it easier on him. Now we just wait and see if the Botox does what it is supposed to and straightens his eyes out, otherwise we may face the more intense surgery where they actually cut into the muscles.

Elijah is recovering well, he is pretty much back to himself!

Thank You to everyone who prayed for Elijah!

Eye Surgery

Elijah will have surgery tomorrow morning at 7:15 a.m. Actually he is having Botox injections in his eyes to see if this will help correct his crossed eyes. But, it has to be done in the hospital under anesthesia. That is the scary part. Please keep him in your prayers. I'll update as soon as we get back. We have to travel for this surgery. Thank you for your prayers! :)

Denise

Pray for me... Pray for Others and Elijah's surgery

We participate in "Pray for Me... Pray for Others" on the Riggs Family Blog. Check out their blog to add your prayer request. Join a community of friends who care about you, and hope you will care about them.


Please pray for Elijah, he will be going into the hospital Friday morning for eye surgery. Please keep us in your prayers, we will be traveling Thursday evening, he has to be at the hospital at 5:15 a.m. on Friday morning. Thank You!

Blog Hop- Favorite Pictures

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Tiny Feet, Elijah's feet during his first month of life.

Caution Man GOD at Work!

Multiple Personality Disorder???

Nah, TTMS, Typical Toddler Mood Swings!

In the Valley

Wow, what a day. Today has been one of those days that I just wish I could have stayed in bed. I am definately in a valley right now. But, that is okay, because I know that the same God who is high on the mountain is still with me in the valley. You know, I was thinking, the times I have felt God closest to me is during hard times in my life. Sometimes I see people who seem to never go through anything, and I wonder, why them, they must be so much closer to God, they are really blessed. But then again, if we are always up on the mountain, and we never "need" God, it seems possible that we would not be as close to him, that we would not learn how to trust him.


I probably shouldn't post this here, and I won't name any names or organizations, but recently I had to change church's. A particular leader in my old church is standing up and saying in front of the whole church that "many people have left the church and regret it now, because they are having things come against them, such as sickness, and job loss". I don't know who reads my blog, but I don't want to have to be afraid that if I mention something less then perfect going on in my life, then someone will use it to prove I am out of God's will because I chose not to stay at a certain church. I believe these things are hurtful to a lot of people. Jesus commanded us to LOVE one another, not constantly judge what someone else is doing.

1 Corinthians 13:1 Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels and have not
charity, I am become as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal.
13:2 And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all
mysteries, and all knowledge; and though I have all faith, so
that I could remove mountains, and have not charity, I am
nothing.
13:3 And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I
give my body to be burned, and have not charity, it profiteth me
nothing.



I have a hard time understanding why something that should be so easy for Christians to do is just so hard, and that is simply to love one another.

Let me say this, if that person or anyone who has heard this being said is reading my blog, I just want to point out, the worst trial in my life (the loss of my children) happened to me while I attending church there. While I was attending church there I was very ill and close to death.


I'm in no way blaming the church, the point I am trying to make is that bad things happen all the time. Bad things are happening right now to people who are sitting right there in church with you. I know that God is with me now, just as he was with me in Tampa, when I lost two babies. I trust in God and in his son Jesus Christ, I know I have a comforter, The Holy Ghost. He is with me always, no matter what church I attend. I know everything that happens is God's will , and I also know that things will get better, not in my time or your time, but in God's time. I know God will bless me and my children, how do I know this, it has been promised to me, I am a child of God, I know this, I may not be perfect, but I know one who is, and I know he loves and forgives me.


John 14:6 Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life, no man cometh
unto the Father, but by me.
John 14:13 And whatsoever ye shall ask in my name, that will I do, that the Father
may be glorified in the Son
14:14 If ye shall ask any thing in my name, I will do it
14:15 If ye love me , keep my commandment
14:16 And I will pray the Father, and he shall give you another Comforter, that
he may abide with you forever

Elijah's been home for a year!

It is hard to believe that is was one year ago tommorrow that we brought Elijah home. So much has changed in a year. Elijah came home at four months old weighing 7lbs. Now at almost 16 months he weighs 2olbs. So much has changed for us in a year. I feel like me and my children are starting a new and hopefully better chapter in our lives. Please keep us in your prayers, as there are a lot of changes coming in the near future!

Elijah when we brought him home, one year ago!

Elijah now! :)

Blog Hop- Encouragement

Elijah

born at 24 weeks 0 days a Twin to Twin Transfusion survivor

he weighed 1lb 8oz , he required major surgery during his first week,

The doctors gave us no hope:

So we prayed.........

And he lived!

"O give thanks to the Lord call on his name

and make known

His doings among the peoples!

1 Chronicles 16:8

I hope Elijah's story will give hope to those who are traveling through life's valleys. Through my experience I learned to trust in God 100%, I now have peace in knowing that God is in control of all things, and joy in knowing that God does answer prayers, and that he is always with us, no matter how much it rains, and that through tragedy God can bring a blessing, though it may be hard to see at the time. I know Elijah's life will always be a testimony to Glorify God!




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Finally a UPDATE!!

Like it tends to do, life goes on...

Elijah is doing well. Both boys have bad colds, hopefully it's not the flu. I am debating if I should take them to the doctor today. If it is the flu I want to catch it in time for medication, if not I have probably exposed them to the flu by taking them to the doctor. It is hard to know what to do, when my oldest son had the flu last winter I didn't take him to the doctor in time for antivirals and he had a really hard time.

On a lighter note, Elijah's therapy(s) are going great. He is babbling away now and he is pushing up on hands and knees and trying very hard to crawl. He commando crawls all over the place. He is almost sitting up on his own. He weighs 19 lbs now, he has come a long way from 1lb 8oz! So far the only lasting effects of his extreme prematurity are the developmental delays. His cognitive skills seem good. He can find his foot now on command, he is a very smart baby! He shows no signs of the dreaded (at least dreaded by me) CP as of yet! The doctor did hear a murmur at his last checkup, but I refuse to worry about it, God has healed Elijah's heart once and HE is in ultimate control!

I thank God every day for the miracles he has worked in Elijah's life.

Our three year old little man is doing well. He is now in therapy for very slight Gross Motor Delays. He will be getting evaluated in the future to see what may be going on to cause his sensory issues. His therapist also seems to think he may be color blind. He is extremely smart, and learns easily,but can't seem to get his colors. Somehow the possibility of colorblindness upsets me more than the thought of him being diagnosed with Aspergers. I'm not sure why this is. I just look at all the colors that surround us, and it makes me want to cry to think he may not be able to see some of them, and may never be able to. I just keep remembering, God is in control!

Little man waters the flowers he just planted!

Brothers and best buddies!

This is just to cute!

Wordless Wednesday

Blog Hop

Here are some of my favorite kid photo's for the blog hop, enjoy!

A Picture of Baby Lucas

Here is a picture I found of Lucas. This picture is one of the only pictures we have of him without all of the tubes, it was taken by a nurse the night Lucas went to Heaven. You can see he and Elijah were identical.

In this picture Lucas was not quite a month old and still weighed less than 1lb 8oz. What a tiny beautiful boy!

sounds like life to me....

Hello all. I have been so busy. Elijah is getting a lot of therapy now. He gets speech twice a week, PT once a week, and OT once a week. I am seeing improvement but he still has a long road ahead. On top of everthing Big Brother A. is going to be evaluated for Gross Motor Delays. I guess so much has been going on with Elijah that I missed out on some important things! I feel so guilty. Also, A. is so VERY smart and verbal that I think I sort of concentrated on that! So now I will probably add extra therapy to my schedule! He is three, so the school system will be responsible for most of his therapy, so he will probably be able to get it while he is in preschool. That will help!

That is one of the reasons I decided to enroll him in preschool. So far he is doing good, but he hates naptime! That isn't surprising!

I have taken lots of new pictures, just got to get them uploaded! Bear with me!

Pray for me... Pray for Others

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Wow, it has been a long time. My life has been so busy, and crazy. Elijah is doing quite well. He is still being stubborn about sitting up though! He is getting intense therapy, physical therapy twice a week (one time in the home), occupational therapy once a week, and speech therapy twice a week. Wow! That is like four times a week outside the home. Throw in biweekly visits to Cranial Technology (3 hours from home) and occasional visits to his many doctors in Roanoke (2 hours away), and now wonder I feel so tired, no wonder my three year old is so grumpy.


Would I be a horrible mommy if I put my three year old in a good daycare program for the rest of July? He would probably thank me, poor little guy!


I know I need to put some more pictures up, but I haven't even taken any recent ones, so I'll throw some old pics up and I promise I'll take some new ones soon!


Stay tuned to this blog, I have a feeling things are going to get crazier, and therefore a lot more interesting! Nothing I want to post about now though, I'm sort of waiting to see how things turn out!


Here are those pictures:

Me and Elijah in the NICU last summer.

Me and Elijah at home a few months ago.

Little man looking all serious, he actually looks this way a lot!

Me and little man, poor baby looks tired in this photo!

SCARY stuff.....

Well this week has started with a bang. I was on my way to pick my oldest up from school, my two little ones were in their carseats in the back. My toddler started crying, this isn't to unusual for him, he hates being in the car. When I got to my oldest son's school the crying had turned into screaming and he was beating himself in the face. I took him out of his carseat and noticed his right eye was swollen shut. He face began to swell, by this time we were well on our way to the ER. The wheezing began and he sort of went out on us and his big brother had to keep telling me that he was still breathing.

It seems like he had a severe allergic reaction to something. He does have a peanut allergy but I don't think he came into contact with peanuts, but you never can tell. He is doing okay today after loads of medication and a shot yesterday. The steroids make him grumpy, and MEAN!

Keep us in your prayers. We have to travel more this week for Elijah's DOC band appointment, it is a loooooong drive!

I may be renting a little house for me and the boy's, money will be very tight but I am used to that, I just worry about my travel expenses, more on all of that later....

Update on Elijah's medical stuff and BIG changes....

Well we have been traveling like crazy for the past two weeks. Elijah saw the Developmental specialist, pulmonologist, and cranial tech last week. This week we did the eye doctor. All of these appointments require travel, so I am tired, and broke. I actually spent almost $100 in gas in just three days last week!! My husband and I recently separated so now I am sort of doing this on my own. It is extremely hard! We have had to leave our home and are currently staying with relatives, I am so wanting to rent a small house that has come available! I want my children to have a nice home, I want things to be normal for them!

Back to Elijah, the developmental specialist said that Elijah is showing development appropriate for a 5-7 month old child in most areas. I didn't like to hear this since Elijah's corrected age is 9 months. It was also confirmed that Elijah has "low tone" mainly in the upper part of his body, this is why he can't sit up yet and why he hates to be put in his Bumbo. This low tone is caused by a brain injury he suffered either before birth due to the TTTS surgery or during or shortly after birth. No one has said Cerebral Palsy yet, but I'm waiting for that shoe to drop. Elijah's Pulmonology appointment went well, as did cranial tech. Elijah's eye doctor wants to do Botox Injections for his eye to see if that may help the crossing over time, otherwise it will require surgery because it can't be corrected with glasses.

Some days I feel so hopeful for Elijah and for my family's situation and others, like today, I feel like I could just plunge into the depths of despair, but I dare not, because there are so many little people depending on me.

Please keep me and my children in your prayers for our situation, medical and financial. My 3 year old is having such a hard time dealing with everything and is showing some anger, which I am sure is normal.

I know I have to keep my eyes on Jesus, not looking to the right or left, there are many days I feel so alone and like he is the only one who cares about me, my children, and our situation. Sometimes I just feel so lost in this world of staying at home, medical appointments, therapies, and now dealing with the sadness and loneliness of a broken marriage.
Please keep us in your prayers....

Birthday's and Well Visit's

Both of my oldest celebrated birthdays this month! They turned 14 and 3!

Big brother A. playing on his bike.

Baby brother in his new DOC band, enjoying his Baby Einstein Jumper.

Elijah and brother both had well visits last week. Over all Elijah got a good report. He now weighs 16 lbs 9 oz, that is a long way from 1lb 8oz a little over a year ago. His weight gain has slowed somewhat, so the doctor is wanting me to really push the calories. I should have no problem with that, thankfully there are no feeding problems and Elijah loves to eat. Elijah still seems to have an allergy to milk though, and that is to bad, considering the doctor wants him to drink milk with instant breakfast instead of formula. The doctor is also wanting Elijah to get more intense therapy so I am waiting on a call about referrals to speech, occupational, and physical therapy. Right now he is just getting one day a week at home.

Brother's check up went really well, he is healthy and developing good. Unlike baby brother though, big brother has to start eating better, he is a little in the chubby department. I think he is adorable, but I do want him to be healthy. All of this traveling and eating out has took a toll on all of us over the past year, I am getting ready to start a diet myself!

This will be a very busy week for us, and probably not a good week to start a diet. I have to take Elijah to three appointments this week, two of them will require an overnight stay and the other a 6 hour round trip. Yes, it is back to Cranial Tech again this week so Elijah's DOC band can be checked and adjusted.

Pictures of Elijah's DOC band

After I painted and decorated.......

DOC band

Sorry I haven't posted in a while. There has been so much going on in my life, I may post more about that later. Elijah got his DOC band Thursday and is doing well with it. Every once in a while he will realize it is up there and try to pull at it. It really doesn't seem to bother him at all though. I am going to upload some pictures today so I will post them later.

I have such a busy week next week. Elijah has a appointment with his Pulmonologist on Tuesday and then with Developmental on Wed. Both of those appointments are in the same town, so that will require an overnight stay. Then I will be coming home on Wed. evening and leaving for Charlotte again on Thursday. Busy, Busy, Busy. I hate to complain but financially this is hard, and I hope my old van can make it, it has to last me for a few years, realistically I don't think it will. Unless they have been there I don't think anyone can understand that the financial hardships of having a premature infant REALLY begin once the baby comes home from the hospital and lasts for months, even years, depending on the child's condition.

Well I have to run now, lots to do, pictures coming soon though!

Pray for me... Pray for Others

We participate in "Pray for Me... Pray for Others" on the Riggs Family Blog. Check out their blog to add your prayer request. Join a community of friends who care about you, and hope you will care about them.

Happy Mothers Day!

I want to wish all mothers a very Happy Mothers Day! Last year at this time I was in Florida, unsure if Elijah would live to celebrate another Mothers Day with his mommy, and I was coming to terms with the fact that I would never spend mothers day with Lucas and David on this earth. I am so blessed this year to be home with my three boy's and to know that I have two precious angels waiting on me in heaven.

God Bless You and have a great day, be thankful for your children and never take a moment with them for granted.

We also celebrated my two older boy's birthdays today! Pictures coming soon! :)

Just a quick post...

I was just looking at some blogs and reflecting. I have to admit, I have been feeling sorry for myself lately. Yes, it is horrible that I have lost two of my children, it is hard to have a sick child, it is a pain to do all the traveling we have to do on limited finances....

But, as I read some of the blogs I have been following I realized something that I have known all along, it could be worse. Elijah could have feeding problems, he could have cerebral palsy, be blind, deaf, you get the point. My other boy's are healthy and happy, there are so many children suffering out there right now. Right now my children are safe and warm in their beds. They are not in the hospital, they are not hungry, they are not homeless, they are not lost.

I think of all the missing children out there, I don't know why this happens. I keep thinking of my little boy, how I would feel if he was out there and I didn't know where. How horrible would it be, not knowing what is happening to your child, not knowing if he is scared, if anyone is comforting him.

This world we live in is so evil, I believe Jesus will come soon. I think the only reason he hasn't came back yet is because he wants to give everyone one more chance, one last chance to accept him and accept everlasting life!

I have saw remarks made as I surfed the internet the past couple of days, I beleive they were made by the same person, I don't remember how it was phrased exactly but it was something to the extent of :
"It bothers me when people attribute something good(like surviving a car crash) to God, who do they think caused the crash to begin with"

I don't know who is writing this and I am sure a lot of people feel this way, God have mercy on them is all I can say. If I could talk to them I would tell them this: "yes bad things happen in this world and for reasons we don't know God allows them to happen, and we know there is great evil in this world, but I don't know how anyone makes it through the bad times without the love and grace of God and Jesus Christ. When I was stuck in Florida for four months, watching two babies die and one suffer and fight for his life, God was my strength and he comforted me like no one else could".

As for the obvious non-belief in Gods ability to perform miracles, I truly believe that often God intervenes, there is a reason for everything that happens, I have seen God move in Elijah's life and make things happen that seemed impossible. Elijah's medical records show multiple diagnosis of cardiomyopathy, but during his last Cardiology appointment when that doctor said "I don't know what the other doctors have been seeing, but he has perfect heart function", I knew that God had answered many prayers and healed my child. You can read about his healing in this post: Elijahs heart

I know I couldn't bear to exist in this world without Gods comforting spirit and his love. I know when I pray that every prayer is heard. Most of all I know that the only son of God suffered and died for me and for everyone else, even for the person who wrote that.

Wow, I meant for this to be a short post! What I mainly wanted to say is that I need to quit complaining!

"God forgive me for complaining, I am truly thankful for all you have done for Elijah and for my healthy boy's, I ask for your continued protection on my children, I ask for your touch for the children whose blogs I follow and that you bless and protect all chidren tonight, those who are sick, alone, afraid, be with them Lord and comfort them, give them peace and hope" In Jesus' name: AMEN

This I recall to my mind, therefore have I hope. It is of the LORD's mercies that we are not consumed, because his compassions fail not. They are new every morning: great is thy faithfulness. The LORD is my portion, saith my soul; therefore will I hope in him. The LORD is good unto them that wait for him, to the soul that seeketh him. (Lamentations 3:21-25)

Good Night and God Bless! :O)

Hi/Lo Thursday

This post is part of "Hi/Lo Thursday" on the Riggs Family Blog. Check out their blog to read everyone else's "Hi/Lo" posts and get your link on their site.

My Highs:

The sun keeps peeping out today, Elijah is still doing great, my salvation and knowing that I will see Lucas and David again! Elijah gets his DOC band next week to help correct his plageocephaly. God is great!

My Lows:

All this rain is getting me down and yesterday was sort of a sad day, it marked one year since Lucas left us.

The trips every other week to NC is going to be difficult, not sure how we will manage financially, not to mention we have to also travel for development and pulmonology this month which will be a overnight stay.

I am thankful my husband is working, but with me being unable to work right now and with my husbands huge pay cut we are struggling to make ends meet.

A sad anniversary...

Today marks the one year anniversary of out little Lucas going to heaven. Just like with the anniversary of Davids death back in April this is a bittersweet day for us. I am sad that we are missing so much with Lucas, his first birthday, his smile, and that his brothers will never know him on earth. But, I rejoice, Lucas is celebrating one year in heaven today. One year with our Saviour. I often wonder if babies grow in heaven. If I go to heaven when I am a old lady will I have grown children waiting on me, or will I have sweet babies? Only God can know this but I like to think I have babies waiting on me, not only the two boy's I lost last year but the ones I lost even before we had the chance to know if they were little boy's or girl's. My personal belief is that they will be babies, simply because of the wonderful dream, I dream I believe was sent to me by God, a dream that gives me great hope, no matter what happens to me in this world. If you didn't read my blog about My dream please do! During my pregnancy with the triplets and the early NICU days I did a MySpace blog. I plan on somehow linking that to this, so you can read the story from the beginning. Right now I am going to copy the post that I wrote a year ago today, I wrote this from my hospital bed, as I was in the hospital again from the blood clots in my lungs:

Tuesday, May 06, 2008 11:55 pm
Very sad....
I just wanted to let everyone know that our little Lucas went to heaven earlier this evening. While he passed he was in the arms of myself and his daddy. I know he was suffering greatly and that he is now in the arms of the Lord. As he passed there was such a peace in the room and I could feel the presence of God all around me. I know he went from our arms to Gods arms. I believe God took him home because he already had suffered so much and he fought such a brave fight. He had a severe brain bleed from birth, had he lived he may have been severely handicapped maybe blind and/or deaf. God took him home where he will be a happy healthy child and I know I will see him again, along with his brother David. I want to thank the Lord for giving us our Lucas for almost a month, I know it was in God's will that he go back to be with him. Thank you all for your prayers, continue to pray for Elijah, he continues to improve but it is such a long road. Once again Thank you all for your prayers and thoughts, I will continue to update on Elijah on here.
Love,
Denise

I have spent today with my little guy's. We had a great morning. I was finally able to take my toddler to the library for story hour. He had so much fun. This is something I have been wanting to do all winter, but couldn't risk taking Elijah out around a group of children, he would have most likely caught RSV from one of the little tykes!

Elijah all smiles at the library!

Enjoying a craft, and puzzles!

story time

Yes today is a sad day, but I am blessed to have my three boy's here with me, and my many children in heaven. Most of all I'm blessed because I know my Redeemer, and I know that because of him I will spend eternity with my children!